15 Undeniable Signs You Live With a Nurse

Relative, friend, or partner, these are the tells that there is a nurse in the house.

1. Everyone hums "Happy Birthday" while washing their hands, because the nurse swears your hands are dirtier than the toilet bowl. The bathroom looks like a hospital, minus the hourly cleaning checklist.

2. You open a casserole and set the lid down face up out of habit. Sterile to sterile, non-sterile to non-sterile, even when changing soiled bed linens.

3. Nobody falls for the five-second rule. The kids know the truth about germs, and the truth keeps them away from dropped food.

4. The car, the house, even a spouse's workspace get disinfected on a schedule. At least once a week, on the nurse's day off, when they are not sleeping.

5. The bed is the most important thing in the house. Not the kitchen, not the living room. For a night shift nurse who caught a code right before endorsement, a comfortable bed is heaven.

6. Half the closet is scrubs, and they still have nothing to wear on a day off. Nothing is as comfortable as scrubs.

7. You only see a doctor when you are bleeding heavily or close to dying. Everything else, the nurse handles at home.

8. "I'll be back soon" means you will be asleep before they return. Rotating shifts are brutal: you sleep when they work and work when they sleep. One nurse's spouse said he feels like a single parent when she is on duty.

9. Housemates become great listeners for gross work stories, usually told at the dinner table. Live with a nurse and you develop a durable ear and a strong stomach.

10. "We'll just pay the bills and come home" turns into groceries, shopping, and visiting friends, all in one trip. Nurses do not have the luxury of free time, so they batch everything.

11. The kids know the real medical terms for body parts. No euphemisms. You probably surprised a science teacher or two.

12. The kids are not afraid of people in white, because they grew up watching a parent leave for work in it. They will even treat the hospital like a playground.

13. Vaccinations happen at home. You either get comfortable with injections or you never escape them.

14. The bandage scissors live in the kitchen and the Mayo scissors in the bedroom. You learned a Mayo holds up for art projects too. Heavy duty.

15. The cabinet under the sink holds hospital grade cleaner. The house smells faintly like a hospital, but it is germ-free.

Recognize a few of these? Then you already know the treasure you have at home.